Wednesday, February 02, 2005
What inspired the title? Simple. Cynthia Alexander.
woke up this morning
i was staring at the ceiling cracks
and the roadmaps and landscapes and highways
i have seen
i have been to places
far and deep in my mind
only to find
comfort in your strangeness
of moving shadows
when i call the wind by name
singing ether water fire
singing earth singing air
i have seen
i have been to places
far and deep in my mind
only to find
comfort in your strangeness
we are slaves to the crimes we commit
in fits of passion we shame
we are nothing we are nothing
we are nothing we are nothing but
the dust on your feet
dying to be born again
singing ether water fire
singing earth singing air
i have seen
i have been to places
far and deep in my mind
only to find
comfort in your strangeness
....There. Nothing really, I just like the song. It's not something I'd normally listen to, but guess what, I like it.
I'm tired of familiarity. I'm tired or routine. Can someone please give me something else to do? I don't wanna go on with this line of thinking, I know where this is leading me. I'm just going to end up ranting on and on about my life, and I want to avoid that as much as possible.
Is it possible to be selfish yet be generous? Is it possible to be happy, and at the same time be confused? Is it possible to be searching for something and be happy at the same time?
Yes. They're all possible.
let it go
2.2.05
Tuesday, February 01, 2005
I honestly don't know why I'm writing this. Must be some kind of bug, given that it's the first day of Febuary and everything. (Gee, why didn't that sound right?) I just saw your friendster posts and I looked at your profile.. Does that make me a stalker now? Your smile can still turn me to mush, even after years of not seeing each other. Okay, obviously, I'm not making sense here. I don't even know what to say to you. Honestly, I don't even miss you anymore. So why the hell am I writing this? Again, I have no definite answer.
Must be nostalgia kicking in. God, I sound like an old lady. It's been.. what, 4 years? Has it been that long? I can still clearly remember how I'd wait by the phone every night waiting for your call. How I'd stop studying just to talk to you, and hear your comments about "Tamahome", when you knew all along that it was you I was talking about. I wish you could've told me that you knew all along, you could've spared me a lot of anguish. It's been 4 years since I started calling Maan to tell her how our conversation went, to tell her how
kilig I got when you say such mushy/cheezy things to me.
How ignorant I was then. To misconstrue your being a good friend as something else. I never wanted to, I guess I just got carried away. I think I should be sorry for that. I'm sorry.
I don't have any ulterior motive in writing this. I doubt that you're even gonna read this, but I wish you a good life nonetheless.
let it go
1.2.05
